Athletic Support: Calling it quits after that halftime show eli.cranor@gmail.com February 27, 2022 Eli Cranor is a former professional quarterback and coach turned award-winning author. Please use the “Contact” page at elicranor.com to send in questions for “Athletic Support.”

Dear Athletic Support: I read your column last week on the Olympics. I never watch the Olympics, but I love football. Sadly, I don’t think I’ll ever watch the NFL again. I’ve had some problems with the NFL for a good while now, but I’m a huge Cowboys fan. I haven’t been able to bring myself to give up on “America’s Team.” This past Sunday did me in. There were too many issues to count, none bigger than that god awful halftime show. Lord have mercy. I can’t believe they’d put such garbage on national television. I wouldn’t let my kids listen to those rappers when they were growing up, and I sure as heck don’t want my grandchildren subjected to it now. That’s the part I just can’t get over. How these bigwig network executives are willing to put this trash out knowing good and well there will be kids watching the game and the halftime show. I love the Cowboys, but I’m giving up on the NFL. I’ll never watch another game again. Can’t tell you how much I miss the good old days. Shame to see it’s come to this.

— America's Team

Dear America’s Team: If I’m being straight up, I got a kick out of watching Dre, Snoop, Eminem and 50 do their thing.

Those dudes wrote the soundtrack to my playing days. I’ll never forget my junior high coach blasting Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” during halftime of our conference championship game.

Here’s a thought: What did your parents think of the music you listened to growing up? Probably the same thing I’ll think about my kids’ choice of music in a few years.

In the end, you get a choice regarding what you watch — or don’t watch — on television. Everybody in this country is entitled to their own opinion. Just remember that your opinion doesn’t account for the country as a whole.


Dear Athletic Support: I bought my son a weight rack for Christmas. It has a bench, a barbell, and two-hundred pounds worth of free weights. He’ll be starting seventh grade football in the fall, and I want to make sure he’s ready. What sort of lifts do you recommend?

— Bigger, Faster, Stronger

Dear BFS: I’d be extra careful with a kid that age. I remember trying to teach seventh graders the ins and outs of power lifts, and it wasn’t easy.

Squats, cleans, bench press — those are the core lifts for most football programs. The Olympic lifts (squat and clean) are complicated. They can take years to master, and can do harm if taught wrong.

If you’re dead set on this, I’d do some serious research before you get started. Go talk to the seventh-grade coach. Let him explain how he teaches each lift.

Once you’ve been coached up, make sure you start light. Don’t put any weight on the bar. As a matter of fact, you’ll be better off teaching your son the proper technique using a broomstick.

Once he’s mastered the form, then you focus on getting bigger, faster, and stronger.


Previous columns:

• I won’t watch the Olympics
• Pickup games causing trouble in neighborhood
• Do coaches still cut kids from teams?
• Son falling behind, again
• Forced to play on fractured ankle
• It’s not about winning in seventh grade
• Daughter can’t keep weight-loss resolution
• The Polish Goal Line Tactic
• Is dance a sport?

Athletic Support Columns 2021
Athletic Support Columns 2020


Outside of athletics, kids’ brains are also at risk. Who knows what sort of impact virtual learning will have on their cognition and critical thinking skills. In this regard, I offer one simple tool — a good book! And luckily, I know just the book for kids struggling with the shift to virtual learning:

BOOKS MAKE BRAINZ TASTE BAD! Okay, you caught me… I’m the author of this book. It was published last week and awarded a #1 New Release ranking on Amazon. BMBTB deals directly with the same topic covered in this column, except in a much more lighthearted, kid-friendly way (zombie teachers and brain-munching screens!) If you end up purchasing this book for your children or grandchildren, I only have one final suggestion — ask them to read it while standing up! Eli Cranor's new book Books Make Brainz Taste Bad has just been released. ZOMBIES HATE BOOKS! Especially the zombie teachers at Haven Middle School. That's why they're using VR headsets to fry kids' brainz. Luckily, Dash Storey knows how to save his classmates from the zombie teachers—BOOKS! They make brainz taste bad! "Eli Cranor has an almost unbeatable advantage. He can remember how it felt to think like a twelve-year-old and he can see the very same events like the adult he is. Don't try to resist this book!" - Jack Butler, Pulitzer-Prize nominated author Eli has a new book coming out March 8th. Don't Know Tough is a football-themed thrilled reminiscent of Friday Night Lights. The book is published by Penguin Random House and is available on Amazon.com.